the rix mix

More than nine out of 10 Americans, men and women alike, have had premarital sex, according to a new study. The high rates extend even to women born in the 1940s, challenging perceptions that people were more chaste in the past.

"This is reality-check research," said the study's author, Lawrence Finer. "Premarital sex is normal behavior for the vast majority of Americans, and has been for decades."

Does this mean I'm an American pioneer? I've never had sex while I was married.

It lends weight to why I'm not in favor of abstinence-based sex education: total abstinence is unlikely. I'm for laws designed to protect minors from sexual predation & exploitation by adults, but I believe that adolescents have a right to express their sexuality, & it is far to better to teach them how to express it safely, with caution, & with respect for oneself & one's partner, than to try to dissuade them altogether, or coerce them into signing "chastity pledges" that for most will only last until the combination of opportunity & hormones coalesces into the "right" time.

Sexuality is warped by sexism & bigotry. The bigotry was on display over the weekend as several Virginia Episcopal churches preferred aligning with a loony Anglican Bishop Akinola from Nigeria to coexisting with a sane gay clergyman from New Hampshire named Gene Robinson. Sexism is everywhere, no need to go to Saudi Arabia. I hear it in American pop music all the time, some velvety voiced very mature & experienced & convincing male singer intoning over the slow sexy beats how he'll "Give it all to you if you give it all to me" while a chorus of what sounds like 14 year old female naifs chirps back,"I'll give it all to you, I'll give it all to you," & I feel like yelling at them, "You dopes, what he's gonna give you is a pissing, pooping, crying baby." Maybe abstinence is a reasonable option. I'd also recommend the part of the movie "Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex" where Woody Allen plays Sperm #1. If the science part of this sex thing is too difficult to understand, then just assume you have to somehow stop a frantic, obsessed nebbish guy you can only see through a microscope from reaching this thing inside you called an "egg."