Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Cindy McCready

On the suicide of talented, troubled Cindy McCready, I posted on FB:
"R.I.P. It's a terrible thing to realize your demons are driving you & you're just along for the ride."

My old friend,  poet  Jim Ruggia, always a more descriptive writer than I,  commented on my post (in part):
"For a lot of people it's a highway at night out there, lights and flashers careening and strange half lit figures on the road side."

What Jim wrote is what happened to Cindy. She went to Nashville at age 18 with her great voice, good looks & ambition. She brought whatever  demons she had with her. Part of the ambition, perhaps even the  strongest  part, was a belief she could escape them if she became a success, a star. Fame only compounded her problems in the sense that they were writ large for all to see. She would have screwed up her life just as much & in much the same way  by staying home.  She might have, however, been less isolated in her out-of-control misery. Maybe even had fewer enablers & few more genuinely helpful friends.

A couple of other FB friends were critical of her for what I think were the wrong reasons.  Why do we believe celebrities ought to be better at handling their demons than we are?  Because they have money to throw at them?  Because they  can afford expensive lawyers & luxurious rehabs?

Yes she did abandon her kids &, as Jim also noted, shot her dog "in one last contemptuous act before shutting out the lights. " But coming from Jim, this is more observation than judgment.  He  understands there's more important causes  for outrage.  & if one must choose a symbol of wealthy arrogance as madness,  Cindy McCready is not a  good one. She was just someone who fucked  up her life, & got a chance to do it in a very public way, & when she decided she couldn't unfuck it, she angrily ended it. We can mourn her.

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